The Importance of Self-Awareness in Spiritual Life

The term self-awareness is a psychological topic that we often encounter in various media. However, did you know that self-awareness is actually deeply implied in the Bible, both in the New and Old Testaments?

This proves that self-awareness is closely connected to spirituality, not merely psychology. So, how important it is for a Christian to understand self-awareness in order to grow a life of faith.

 

What is self-awareness?

Solomon, a biblical figure full of wisdom, said that a wise person has self-awareness, through the expression 'understands his own way.'

“Understanding one’s own way is the wisdom of the prudent, but fools are deceived by their own folly.” – Proverbs 14:8.

Wikipedia defines self-awareness as, “A conscious knowledge of one’s own character, feeling, motives and desires.”

In other words, a person’s ability to recognize the internal part of himself (inner world) is one form of intelligence.

In the book Emotional Intelligence, Daniel Goleman states that self-awareness is the primary foundation of emotional intelligence, or EQ (Emotional Quotient). In the past, EQ was considered less important than IQ (Intelligence Quotient) in determining a person’s success, before it was discovered that EQ also has influence. Self-awareness is the ability to know, realize, and monitor our inner world (internal world).

I personally believe that self-awareness is the whole of our internal being, which includes thoughts (values, ideas, views), emotions (feelings, desires, intuition), behavior (tendencies, character, motives), and their impact (on others and ourselves).  

Self-awareness includes 6 abilities, namely:

• recognizing inner world our own
• becoming aware of inner world when it appears
• monitoring inner world it
• being aware of the impact of inner world it
• eliminating inner world that is undesirable
• deciding on inner world that we want to have

Check the self-awareness profile you

According to Dr. Tasha Eurich’s research, there are two types of self-awareness: ISA (Internal Self-Awareness) and ESA (External Self-Awareness).

ISA (Internal Self Awareness) is the ability to understand our own inner world .

ESA (External Self Awareness) is the ability to understand how other people see our inner world .

Based on this, people are divided into four self-awareness profiles:

1. Seekers: people with low ISA and low ESA.
   Seekers experience stagnation, and feel frustrated in performance and relationships.
2. Introspector: people with high ISA and low ESA.
   They easily engage in self-introspection, focusing on personal goals and personal needs. However, Introspectors tend to be proud, find it hard to accept input, and are unaware of blind spot.
3. Pleasers: people with low ISA and high ESA.
   Pleasers focus on how they appear to others. Pleasers always want to please other people, rather than focusing on their own goals and the fulfillment of their own needs and desires.
4. Aware: people with high ISA and high ESA.
   They understand themselves and what they want to achieve. Even so, they still seek and value the opinions and feedback of others. As leaders, they weigh decisions in balance between personal judgment and judgment from other people’s perspective.

Which character do you have right now? Are you already in the category of Aware people?

If not, do not worry. Let us learn more about self-awareness according to God’s Word.

Self-awareness according to the Bible

The Bible reveals that self-awareness has a number of important roles in our physical and spiritual lives:

• Cultivating confidence and humility

Self-awareness helps us see ourselves proportionately, so that we do not look down on (underestimate) or think too highly of (overestimate) ourselves. People with optimal self-awareness will have confidence, but not arrogance.

“Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but think of yourself with sober judgment, according to the measure of faith God has given to each of you.” – Romans 12:3

• Having good character

One characteristic of successful people is self-awareness. Good self-awareness makes a person quick to introspect, so that he learns quickly and corrects mistakes. He is wise in sorting and choosing right life values, and eliminating wrong life values. Spiritually, he is easy to guide and grows.

People with optimal self-awareness will have the character of Christ.

• Stimulating repentance

When Jesus spoke with the Samaritan woman by the well, He was actually helping her look within herself and become aware of her sin. Jesus was not rebuking her, but enabling her to have self-awareness. As the Wonderful Counselor, Jesus was counseling the Samaritan woman.

“For to us a child is born, to us a son is given; and the government will be upon his shoulder, and his name shall be called: Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.” – Isaiah 9:6

The decision to repent must be preceded by an awareness of sin. In other words, we examine whether what we think, feel, or do is right or wrong. Why do we do it? What is God’s view of it? What is its impact on ourselves and others, and what should be done?

The sooner we become aware of our sin, the easier it is to repent.

“Therefore come to your senses and repent, so that your sins may be wiped away.” – Acts 3:19

• Saving ourselves and others.

Self-awareness enables us to examine whether our way of life is in line with or has strayed from God’s Word. Perseverance in maintaining self-awareness is a key to successfully guarding the salvation God has given.

“Watch yourself and your teaching closely. Persevere in them, because by doing so you will save both yourself and those who hear you.” – 1 Timothy 4:16

People with self-awareness at an optimal level will have the character of Christ.

The consequences of lacking self-awareness

Low self-awareness produces many negative effects in a person’s life. Sometimes people tend to underestimate this impact, because they think only others are affected, not themselves.

The Bible presents a number of important facts about the consequences of lacking self-awareness, namely:

1. Damage to relationships

People with low self-awareness will have a strong tendency to blame others. They do not see their own faults. Even small mistakes by others will seem very large. On the other hand, they are unaware of their own very great faults.

"Why do you look at the speck in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, Let me take the speck out of your eye, when there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye." – Matthew 7:3-5

Low self-awareness risks damaging our relationships with others. People become uncomfortable building relationships with us. They are vulnerable to being hurt and want to pull away. In the end, we feel lonely and abandoned, but without any sense of guilt or regret. Rather than introspecting, people with low self-awareness are instead controlled by the feeling of 'I am always the victim' (victim mentality).

2. The ruin of life

“There is a way that seems right, but in the end it leads to death.” – Proverbs 16:25

Without self-awareness, people will not realize that their steps are heading toward destruction. The parable of the prodigal son gives a picture that the son did not realize that his thoughts and actions were destroying his own life.

“Then he came to his senses and said, How many of my father’s hired servants have more than enough food, while I am dying here of hunger.” – Luke 15:17

3. Degradation of the quality of the heart  

People who do not have self-awareness will view all their actions as always and certainly right, even though that is not necessarily so.

“Every person’s way is right in his own eyes, but the Lord weighs the heart.” – Proverbs 21:2

The Word reveals that the human heart tends toward deceitfulness. Sin causes human beings to have a tendency to do what is wrong. Without self-awareness, a person will keep on sinning.

The story of David and Bathsheba is an example. Beginning with lustful thoughts, David fell into the sin of adultery. Bathsheba became pregnant, and David sought a way to cover up his disgrace. He tried to trap Uriah, Bathsheba’s husband, into taking responsibility for his wife’s pregnancy. David ran from responsibility to protect his image, and did not realize that he had also fallen into the sin of pride.

His trap failed, and David conceived an evil plan to kill Uriah. The man died on the battlefield after David committed premeditated murder without using his own hands. The plan went smoothly; no one knew what he had done. But God knew his hardened heart and sent the prophet Nathan to make David aware.

“The heart is deceitful above all things, and hardened: who can understand it?” – Jeremiah 17:9

Without self-awareness, our hearts will easily fall into sin, and even become hardened.

Self-awareness enables us to examine whether our way of life is in line with or has strayed from God’s Word.

Why is it difficult to have optimal self-awareness?

Unconscious
Often our behavior operates at an unconscious level (unconscious) or on autopilot. Our actions become automatic, because we pay too little attention to our inner world.

Blind spot   
Not only does the retina of the eye have a blind spot, but we also have blind spots within ourselves. It is impossible for us to know ourselves completely. There are certain parts that we can only recognize with the help of others.

Feel-good effect
Generally, we feel happy when we see our positive side, so we tend to focus only on the good things. We are not used to seeing both sides of ourselves, both positive and negative. Spiritually, the Holy Spirit continually reminds us to do what is right or reveals what is wrong in our behavior. However, we often ignore Him and choose to follow the desires of the flesh.  

Cult of self
Worshiping ourselves, or pride. The development of social media makes it easy for us to become popular. We feel great, cool, and capable even though reality is not as we imagine.

“For if anyone thinks he is something, when he is nothing at all, he deceives himself.” – Galatians 6:3

How can we increase self-awareness?

Here are practical steps to increase self-awareness:

1. Believe in the importance of self-awareness.

Without awareness of the importance of self-awareness, we will not have the desire to possess it.

Develop this conviction by counting the benefits of having self-awareness and the losses if you do not have it. Study the life stories of biblical figures who had self-awareness and those who did not. A change in perspective will also affect your behavior.

2. Make a decision   

After making a decision, accompany it with a commitment to carry it out. Commitment makes you persevere, even when your efforts rise and fall.

3. Practice correctly

Learn to explore the deepest parts of yourself. Recognize your feelings and name them one by one. Write down your motivations and fears in a personal journal, then build the courage to share them with those closest to you or with a spiritual mentor. We may not immediately become skilled in this, but consistent practice will help cultivate self-awareness.

“The purposes of a person’s heart are like deep waters, but one who has understanding draws them out.” – Proverbs 20:5

Self-introspection

Effective self-introspection can be done by go wide (broadly), not go deep (deeply).

Go deep is done by asking, “Why?”

For example: Why do I not support the team’s success? Why do I do things that make the team fail? Go deep tends to produce justification behind our thoughts, feelings, and behavior.

Go wide is done by asking, “What?”

For example: What have I done to support our team’s success? What makes me reluctant to give support to the team? What do I do that hinders the team’s success?

4. Seek feedback (feedback)

Stopping asking for input from others will make us stop growing. This often happens to people who feel 'already experienced.' They overestimate their own abilities, and so stop learning. Moreover, people tend to hesitate to give feedback to those considered smarter or more experienced.

On the other hand, insecure people will underestimate themselves, so they are afraid or not ready to receive feedback.   

Not infrequently, asking for input from the wrong people actually traps us or discourages us. Consider the right people from whom to seek feedback.

They are people who:

• have spiritual wisdom (wisdom), because they can give constructive input
• compassion (full of love), because they sincerely want to help
• often walk with us, because they know us well
• are more experienced

Ask your spouse or spiritual mentor to raise questions or other perspectives about feelings / thoughts that you may not realize. Involve them in evaluating, as a mirror to see yourself proportionately. Once again, this step requires the courage to accept yourself as you are, but it is not impossible to do.

5. Ask God to intervene

Pray over and wrestle through your efforts to build self-awareness. Only God knows the deepest thoughts and feelings of human beings, and only He is able to change you.

“Test me, O LORD, and try me; examine my inner being and my heart.” – Psalm 26:2  

Of course this requires humility before God and acceptance of ourselves. Many of us did not receive enough acceptance from our parents, so we find it difficult to accept our own shortcomings. Often too, we ask God to intervene, but do not allow Him to work fully to change us.

By practicing self-introspection, walking with the right people, and involving God, surely we can build optimal self-awareness, so that our lives become increasingly aligned with His will. Amen.

This article was edited from the third-place winner (Wahyu Eliya Sisnardiyanti) in “GKDI Writers Day 2018“.

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