Low Self-Esteem vs Humility: Where Is the Line?

Everyone from every ethnic group usually has something they take pride in. These strengths are what give us pride in our identity that is uniquely ours.

Yet balancing a sense of self-pride is indeed easier said than done. Sometimes, it is more difficult than easy.

Excessive pride has the potential to turn into arrogance. We may think that people with certain skin colors are more beautiful. We are convinced that certain body types are more beautiful than others. Or we view ourselves more highly than those with characteristics different from ours.

Whether we realize it or not, we put labels of higher and lower status based on a narrow and biased perspective. We forget that everyone has weaknesses that come as a package with their strengths. This is the fact: we are sinful human beings. Creatures who still have pride, even though the measure differs from one person to another.

Low Self-Esteem = Pride?

Pride comes in various forms that we can recognize in everyday life:

1. Blatant pride

Evident in attitudes and behavior that can be directly observed. For example, boasting, showing off, or openly insulting others.

2. 'Subtle' pride

Not obvious, and usually comes in the form of thoughts that look down on others. Thinking other people are not as great as we are, whether in knowledge, wealth, physical beauty, and so on.

3. Low self-esteem

If the two forms above can be compared to lifting up the chin, then this third form of pride actually keeps us constantly looking down.

Insecurity or low self-esteem is the feeling that other people are above us in certain things. We see ourselves as less pretty or handsome, less cool, less rich, less smart, and so on. Unlike the previous types, insecurity happens because a person focuses only on their shortcomings, but does not see or give thanks for their own strengths.

When we are drowning in low self-esteem, we forget that all human beings are creations of God who are one. God designed us wonderfully and for a wonderful purpose as well. So, by having low self-esteem, we indirectly oppose and belittle the Creator Himself. It is as if we are saying, “Later, when I am greater than person A, then I can be proud.” Well, does this not also mean pride?

Breaking free from low self-esteem and boasting in the Lord

Brothers and sisters, we do not need to become greater than other people in order to feel okay with ourselves.

We only need to know God's purpose and heart when He created us:

“Before I was born, You had already seen me. Before I began to breathe, You had planned every day of my life. Every one of my days was written in that book.” (Psalms 139:16)

“For we are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared beforehand.” (Ephesians 2:10)

“For You formed my inward parts; You wove me together in my mother’s womb. I give thanks to You because I am fearfully and wonderfully made." (Psalm 139:13-14)

See how wonderfully God knows and designs every individual He has made!

Our existence is planned.

We are prepared for good works.

We are His wonder.

Security in that conviction is what will give us healthy self-confidence.

So, every time we are tempted to exalt or belittle ourselves, apply these principles:

1. I matter, and other people matter too

"… in humility let each one regard others as more important than himself." (Philippians 2:3)

All human beings are equally beautiful and important before God. We do not become confident by belittling or putting down other people.

Healthy confidence is built on the understanding that ‘I matter, and other people matter just as much.’ We are not less than others, nor are we more than others. If we hold on to that principle in our hearts, surely our lives will be filled with love and respect.

2. Everyone has weaknesses

Remember all our shortcomings and sinfulness. Not to pity ourselves or feel useless, but so that we may worship the goodness of God. John 3:16 reminds us: Even though we have many weaknesses, God’s grace still abounds in our lives.

By realizing this, we can make room for the weaknesses and strengths of others. We have a balanced and positive view of ourselves.

3. Our humble God delights in and uses humble people too

“Therefore He says: “God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble.” (James 4:6)

If God Himself, who is perfect, is humble, what basis do we have for being proud?

God is unwilling to use arrogant people. He humbles them, because those who have already exalted themselves cannot be lifted up anymore. But God will use those who continually maintain humility.

Putting on humility makes it possible for all God’s plans to take place in and through us. When we let go of all pride and lean on the Lord, He is the One who will strengthen and lift us up at every stage of life’s journey.

"But let the one who boasts, boast in the Lord." (2 Cor 10:17)

Developed from the article "Humility - Your Key to God’s Plan" by Rev. Togar Sianturi. -