Children: A Hindrance or an Encouragement in Serving God?

Most people agree that children are a precious gift. Almost every married couple (especially in Indonesia) wants to have them.

The presence of children truly brings happiness to a family. However, that happiness also comes as a package deal  with hassles here and there. Welcoming the presence of a tiny, helpless little one is certainly not easy. A couple who once had the freedom to travel now has limited mobility after having children.

Ironically, the little one is often used as a reason to stop serving God. “Oh dear, our child is at a very active stage right now. We are overwhelmed. For now, we are stepping back from ministry.”

If children are a gift, why does their presence become a hindrance to serving God?

Raising Children Is a Noble Task

Do not let your zeal grow dull; keep your spirit burning and serve the Lord. – Romans 12:11

Not rarely, there are people who were on fire in their youth, but after getting married and having children, their zeal for ministry grows dim and nearly goes out. Those who were once diligent in serving now begin to reduce their capacity.

Being a parent is not an easy job. There is no school curriculum that prepares someone to become a parent. Everything happens naturally, so quite a few people become frustrated after starting a family. Stepping back from ministry seems like the best solution.

Each phase of a child’s growth has its own challenges. It does not stop with toddlerhood; those challenges remain in their preteen and teen years —and may even feel heavier, especially in an age when all information is open and can be accessed from anywhere.

Teaching children to know God, through our lives as parents, is the highest task. Parents who want to do the best for their children must depend on God, learn from one another, while continuing to make a positive contribution in the spiritual community.

And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord. – Ephesians 6:4

What Hinders Ministry?

If you are thinking of stepping back from ministry because of your children, try checking a few things below. Could it be that all this time you have been:

1. Excessively Worried

Young parents are generally familiar with children having fevers, coughs, colds, and the like. This is normal, considering that they are still in an early stage of growth and development and the completion of their bodily organs.

However, there is no need to worry excessively. If your little one is sick, visit a doctor, take quick action, maximize nutritious intake, and always maintain cleanliness.

There is no need to avoid worship or shut yourself at home because you are afraid your child will catch an illness. Parents who worry too much may actually be passing that fear on to their own child.

2. Lazy

Our lives when we were single and when we become parents are certainly different. Parents must be more alert in doing everything. Wake up earlier and do more things. This may cut into our rest time, but for the sake of caring for the family, there is a price to be paid.

Only those who are able to manage their own household can serve and bless others. This is the picture of the capable wife in Proverbs 31:27: She watches over all the affairs of her household, and does not eat the bread of idleness.

Perhaps it is not that you do not have time, but that you have not yet been able to allocate your time well. For that reason, it is never too late to learn.

3. Spoiling 

Loving and spoiling are two different things. A child who is overly spoiled will become fearful and dependent. Everything will always depend on the parents, draining the father’s and mother’s energy so that nothing is left for going out and serving others.

Learn the boundary between loving and spoiling for the good of your child and yourself.

4. Defensive: “Rather Than Disturbing …”

Some think, “Rather than having my child disturb things and me being unable to enjoy worship, it is better for us to just stay home.”

Instead of thinking that way, why not form the opposite thought? “How can I still worship and my child not disturb others?” Or, ask for advice from brothers and sisters who already have families or from your mentor; perhaps they have a very effective strategy in this matter.

There may indeed be no official guide to becoming a good parent, but with wisdom from God, we can handle it wisely.

Start From Home

Everything starts from home. Do not expect our little one to be obedient and know proper manners at church if they have never been taught to obey at home.

Be a delightful friend to them, while also being respected. In that way, a child will not only feel close to us, but also honor us as parents. A sense of respect will make a child willing to listen to our advice or guidance, without feeling forced or acting out of fear.

Make it a habit to make agreements with your child, including not disturbing others while worship is taking place. Cooperation between husband and wife is very important in this agreement. A child must know that father and mother have the same standard, so they do not seek protection from one side when they break the rules.

Do not hide away, but be parents who are confident in bringing your child to a worship service (if necessary). Because there, the child’s obedience and the parents’ patience (which have been trained at home) are both tested.

Raising Children Is Ministry Itself

There is no need to feel bad or like a failure if the character of your son or daughter has not yet matched your expectations. As long as we are willing to learn, there will always be hope. Keep giving yourself in ministry, while also improving yourself in the task of parenthood that we are carrying out.

Rather than complaining about how difficult it is to raise children, first give thanks that God has entrusted you to be a parent. In fact, God Himself believes that you are able to carry out your responsibility well.

In our struggle to become good parents, we do not need to pause our service. Ministry outside the home and ministry within the family are a package that cannot be separated. Raising children well is a form of our service to God.

Children are God’s messengers to refine our character as  better individuals or parents. Children are the first witnesses of whether God’s word is alive within us. And children are our encouragement to keep serving God. Amen! - Church GKDI is currently present in 35 cities. We have Bible Study activities in every area; if you need information or would like to get involved, contact us at contact Church GKDI Official: WhatsApp 0821 2285 8686 or Facebook / Instagram GKDI Official

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