Be Careful! 3 Things That Can Damage Your Relationships

Healthy relationships are what everyone longs for. Whether we realize it or not, in almost every area of life, we all need other people's help. For example, in terms of working, studying, or house hold chores. The problem is, some of us may not know how to build healthy relationships. 

Tips and tricks for building good relationships are easy to find from various sources. However, learning the things that can damage relationships is no less important. This will help you become a better person and make your social interactions healthier and longer-lasting. 

Sometimes, it is not big things that damage relationships, but rather small things that carry long-term risks. By learning the signs that can potentially become stumbling blocks, you can improve the quality of your relationships, whether in friendship, marriage, family, community, or work.

Watch Out for 3 Relationship-Damaging Signs

1. Lack of Respect for Other People

How long you have known someone will affect your attitude toward that person. For example, when you have just met someone, you will usually act formally and carefully. When you are with friends, relatives, or your spouse, your attitude will tend to be more relaxed and informal.

This is where the danger lies: the closer you are to someone, the more likely you are to take that person lightly. For example, forgetting to say sorry for mistakes-mistakes. Or, asking for help in a less polite way. And, most often, giving nicknames that actually hurt, such as 'Fatty' or 'Baldy.' Why? Because we feel close, and without realizing it, we become careless in how we treat that person.

Of course, this is not pleasing to God. Romans 12:10 says, "Love one another with brotherly affection and outdo one another in showing honor." Paul speaks about how we should love one another, and one sign of love is showing respect to one another.

Try to appreciate every bit of help you receive. Whether from friends, relatives, or coworkers, do not forget to say thank you when they help you. If you have a need, express it with respect, so that they will gladly help you.

2. Stonewalling

Stonewalling is behavior in which a person, whether intentionally or not, tries to delay, avoid, divert, end, or refuse discussing a problem. This term, often called the silent treatment can also be expressed nonverbally. For example, leaving an ongoing argument, rolling the eyes, and shutting the ears or eyes. 

If you hear the words, "Ah, enough, no need to talk about it anymore; I'm tired!" or "I don't want to talk about this anymore, it's really not important," that is a sign you are beingstonewalled by that person. 

This attitude is harmful not only to the victim, but also to the one doing it. The habit of avoiding or refusing to communicate because you feel uncomfortable facing problems will make it difficult for us to resolve conflict. Doing stonewalling seems like the easy, but the Word of God disagrees. 

In Matthew 5:23-24 it says, "Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar and go. First be reconciled to your brother; then come and offer your gift."

God wants us to resolve problems, not avoid them. He wants us to make peace, not just look peaceful while something is still lodged in the heart. Problems that are not resolved can produce a root of bitterness.

Indeed, for those who find it difficult to express feelings, resolving conflict takes effort and self-denial. However, believe this: it is far better to resolve one problem right away than to face more problems later on.

3. Insecurity (Insecurity)

Feeling insecure or insecurity can erode your relationships with other people. 

Insecurity is basically the feeling that you are always less than other people. Because you see others as more than you, you feel like you are nothing. As a result, feelings such as difficulty trusting, anxiety, low self-confidence, putting others down, jealousy, or feeling cornered when criticized easily arise within you.

Insecurity can lead to many bad things. Because you always doubt yourself, you stop growing. Or, as compensation for feelings of inferiority, you are tempted to put other people down. You rely on money, beauty, or your intelligence to boast, because you are so afraid of looking inadequate.

To break free from this trap, you must reassure yourself on a strong foundation. This is what is said in Isaiah 28:16: "Therefore this is what the Lord GOD says: 'See, I lay a stone in Zion, a tested stone, a precious cornerstone, a sure foundation; the one who believes will not be shaken with panic!'"

Place your sense of security in God. Not in abilities, achievements, possessions, or even other people. 

Start with Small Things

Lack of respect for other people, stonewalling, and insecurity are three things that can hinder communication and damage relationships. They may seem small, but their effects are not small. The good news is, you can start building healthy relationships through small things too. It may not be easy, but every good thing is worth fighting for. Agree? 

Let us keep striving to maintain good relationships with the people around us!

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References:

psiloveyou.xyz/every-day-damage-thats-destroying-our-relationships-9cfa0a183b83 www.verywellmind.com/coping-when-your-spouse-shuts-down-4097175 www.brides.com/insecurity-in-relationships-5105358 today.line.me/id/v2/article/9KrR23

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